Reconnecting with Your Inner Child

A Path to Healing and Wholeness

“There is a child inside each of us who still believes in the possibility of being loved unconditionally.” – Jean Shinoda Bolen

What if the anxiety you feel before speaking your truth isn’t just anxiety—but the voice of a younger you, once ignored or dismissed?
What if your difficulty setting boundaries isn’t weakness, but a protective instinct you developed when love felt conditional?

We carry our histories in quiet, invisible ways.

This post is the first in a new series exploring the different parts of ourselves that shape how we move through the world. And today, we begin with the one who came first: the inner child.

What Is the Inner Child?

The term inner child refers to the part of your psyche that holds your early emotional experiences—both joyful and painful. It’s the place where your early needs for love, safety, and belonging were either met or missed.

Your inner child isn’t imaginary. It shows up in very real ways:

• The way you react when someone doesn’t text back
• That familiar pang of shame after setting a boundary
• The comfort you feel in small rituals that remind you of home

It’s the part of you that remembers what it was like to feel small. And often, it’s the part of you that still does.

Your inner child carries the emotional imprint of your earliest relationships—and shapes how you feel and connect today.

When the Child is Wounded

Many of us carry inner child wounds—unacknowledged pain from times we were dismissed, criticized, abandoned, or neglected.

These wounds don’t always scream. Sometimes, they whisper.

Here are some of the most common types of inner child wounds:

• Abandonment: feeling emotionally or physically left behind. This can lead to clinginess, fear of being alone, or people-pleasing.
• Neglect: not being seen, heard, or emotionally cared for. This often results in low self-worth or disconnection from one’s needs.
• Trust violations: broken promises, unsafe caregivers, or betrayal. Adults with this wound often struggle with vulnerability and closeness.
• Guilt and shame: being made to feel that your feelings or needs were “too much” or “bad.” This can lead to chronic self-blame or fear of expressing emotions.

It’s important to remember: these aren’t indictments of your childhood. They are reflections of how your younger self interpreted the world, often without the tools to make sense of it fully.

How These Wounds Show Up in Adulthood

If this inner child remains unseen, their wounds tend to echo in our adult lives—especially in the places that matter most.

You might notice:

• Emotional dysregulation: Sudden waves of anger, sadness, or anxiety that feel disproportionate to the moment.
• Relationship difficulties: Trouble forming healthy attachments, or the feeling that intimacy is unsafe.
• Low self-esteem: A deep belief that you are unworthy, unlovable, or always falling short.
• Boundary issues: Difficulty saying no, asserting yourself, or prioritizing your own needs.
• Avoidance and detachment: Disconnection from others, or from your own emotional world.

These aren’t personality flaws. They are adaptations. At some point, they kept you safe. But now, they may be keeping you stuck.

Recognizing and healing your inner child’s wounds can transform anxiety, self-doubt, and relationship patterns.

Why Inner Child Work Matters

This is where the arc begins to bend toward healing.

Inner child work is the process of reconnecting with this wounded part of ourselves—not to live in the past, but to bring understanding, compassion, and repair to it.

When we do this work, something remarkable happens:

• We stop reacting from old pain and start responding from current truth.
• We stop blaming ourselves for how we feel and start caring for the part of us who felt abandoned.
• We become more whole, not by erasing our history, but by integrating it.

Healing your inner child doesn’t mean blaming your parents or reliving every painful memory. It means turning inward with gentleness and asking: “What did I need back then? And how can I offer it now?”

Ways to Reconnect and Heal

There is no single method. Healing is a deeply personal journey. But here are some ways to begin:

1. Acknowledge the Inner Child: Start by recognizing that this part of you exists. Visualize them. Write them a letter. Picture them at different ages. You may be surprised by how much they want to be heard.
2. Listen With Curiosity: Tune into moments when your reactions feel big. Ask: How old does this feeling feel? Is this your adult self responding—or your 6-year-old self still seeking safety?
3. Create Emotional Safety: Just like real children, your inner child needs consistency, reassurance, and tenderness. That might mean: saying, “You’re safe now,” validating your feelings instead of minimizing them, and setting boundaries on their behalf
4. Engage in Play and Creativity: Reconnect through the things you loved as a child: painting, singing, running barefoot, writing stories. These aren’t frivolous activities—they’re bridges.
5. Practice Self-Compassion: Many inner child wounds are born from feeling “too much” or “not enough.” Your healing begins when you start offering yourself what you once needed: acceptance, softness, and space.
6. Work with a Therapist: A skilled therapist or counsellor can help you navigate this process in a safe, supported environment. They can guide you in understanding patterns, releasing shame, and practicing new ways of being.

You don’t have to do this alone. In fact, you were never meant to.

Therapy offers a safe, supported path to reconnecting with your inner child and building a more grounded, empowered self.

A Final Word: Wholeness is the Goal

Healing your inner child isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about returning to who you were—before the world told you who you had to be.

This is the first of many explorations into the different parts of ourselves we’ll uncover in this series. In the coming posts, we’ll meet the Inner Critic, the Protector, the Exiled Self and the Shadow Self. Each one plays a role in your story—and each one has something to teach you.

But the inner child? They’re the beginning.

And often, the most important one to come home to. So Reach Out. We’re here to help.